What is the difference between Empathy and Sympathy?

Do you feel sympathy or empathy? Is there a difference? I have to admit that one of my pet peeves is people using the words sympathy and empathy interchangeably, as if there were no difference. However, when you teach classes about empathetic listening, the difference...

What you say about others, says everything about you.

The Power of Reflective Listening "Did you see the nasty look  that salesman just gave me?" "He didn't give it to you mommy. You had it when you came in." Reflection has always been my favorite of the rules. It's influence permiates all the rules, and incoprorating it...

The Four Agreements and Why I Take Them Personally

Recently, a friend introduced me to "The Four agreements." Like so many, she lives by then, and she was eager to share their wisdom with me. In case you are as unfamiliar with "The Four Agreements" as I was, they come from a book by Miguel Ruiz entitled, The Four...

Oceania Fun for Passport Kids

Welcome to Oceania After my month of "Everything Africa" went so well, I decided to head to the other side of the world and spend a month on "Everything Oceania." My journey began at the library where I raided the kids section on everything I could find on Oceania's...

Well Aren’t You The Smart One, or What Makes a Bad Word Bad

A Conversation with Kids Today in my after school class, one of my kids spilled what I called, "a heck of water" on the floor.  As we were cleaning it up, one of my girls, we will call her Gecki, casually asked, "Is that a bad word?" She was of course referring to my...

“What is trust?” he asked softly.

What is trust in relationships? I had an interesting encounter with three of my students today. Their names have been changed to protect the innocent. I shall call them 6-year-old-boy, 7-year-old-boy, and 8-year-old-boy. So I am walking through our outer lobby when I...

Stop Driving Me Crazy: Reflections from the River

Is Someone Driving You Crazy? A new student, who is just starting down the river, sent me an e-mail that ended, "I hope you have a section on how to not let (my co-worker) drive my crazy." I know that she meant it as a joke. But strangely enough the rules of the river...

Invisible Friends Series: How to Give Constructive Criticism

THE IMPORTANCE OF INVISIBLE FRIENDS  Episode Two: How to Give Constructive Criticism  Or what the heck is collaborative problem solving? “Hey,” I called out to my inner-self, “You said that you would help me to explain the difference between constructive criticism,...

A Case Study that Defines Pet Peeves and Turns Them Into Positives

What's My Pet Peeve and Why Do I Have One? A Case Study from Fourteen Rules for Navigating Life The Urban Dictionary defines Pet Peeve as "Something that maybe a bit annoying to most people but is very annoying or upsetting to a particular person. Related to the...

Are you filling your days with sand?

Have you been filling your life with sand? If you have ever taken a time management class, you might have heard "the aquarium story." It goes something like this. A life coach come on to the stage with a large aquarium and silently begins filling the aquarium with...
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